im so bored right now. i should be packing but i literally feel like i am incapable of lifting my ass off the chair. i hate the days that i go home, not because i dont wanna go home because i want to more than anything, but because on those days i cant ever seem to find things to do because theres always this unsettling feeling. i know im leaving, i know i have to pack, so everything has to go along with a schedule. i hate packing too because i always feel like im gonna forget something so i overpack, later on i find ive still forgotten something. i hate it when things are a mess too, even though im a disorganized mess most of the time, but it bugs me when things are out of place, however, i never get up to put them to their right places. its so weird because somehow, my stuff always seems to be all over the place. i may clean up my room and the next day its like KABOOM! explosion. i also find i smoke alot more when im bored and restless. surprise surprise there! ive been up 2 hours an have already had 3 ciggs and am about to go for another one. im scared to imagine what it will be like when i run out of these wonderful Sweet Dreams. They taste so good, but they are expensive. im kinda broke right now, it sucks alot, i dont have money to buy my family presents and its so hard to find a job. i applied for Victoria's Secret and went to the interview, i thought i presented myself well but they still havent called. now im facing the unpleasant task of more applications and more interviews and i only have a month to work. it seems pointless but oh how i want a job. i wanna be able to support myself, and my dog. I love my dog.
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